You know those mums who totally have their shit together? Yeah?! Me too.  And I’m not one of them.  Let me tell you about my day in the hope that, in some small way it makes you feel better about yours.  Today was tough. It started out fine. I even managed a lie in until 7.30 (we don’t count the wake ups to feed or wee overnight). I made Vince’s sandwiches last night too so didn’t have to rush doing them  (yes we are very new age in our house)! The day went tits up somewhere around 8am. First of all I had only hadRead More →

I know most of my blogs are tongue in cheek and hopefully bring a little laughter to your day so I apologise in advance for this installment. I’m writing this following the recent storyline in EastEnders. The tragic death of Paul brought back memories from my early twenties. When I was 24 I lost my boyfriend to an accident at work. We’d been going out together for about 8 months. We had plans to move in together and had been on holiday to Torquay in his little red Fiat. The night before his death we’d been to our usual Thursday night karaoke at our localRead More →

I didn’t intend this blog to be about family life or being a mum as I think there’s more to my life than that but it would seem having a five year old and (nearly) four month old mean that actually that is all my life is about, for the time being at least. Anyway.  School family BBQ and disco.  Seriously.  This is what my Friday nights have become.  Gone are the days of getting home from work, jumping in the shower for AT LEAST half an hour then spending a good couple of hours moisturising, putting on enough make up to make the MACRead More →

There was an article in the local rag recently about a woman who had complained to a train company about workmen who had wolf whistled at her.  Now.  Let’s set the scene. Said woman was alone on a platform locally following an awards ceremony in London. She was waiting on a connecting train. She was dressed up.  It was late at night. She was wolf whistled at by several workmen that were working for the train company nearby. She felt vulnerable. I can understand that.  I have walked home from the pub slightly inebriated on countless occasions and yes I felt vulnerable.  Head down.  WalkRead More →

Ok.  Own up! Whose bright idea were baby groups? You know, the ones in a musty church hall with toys that probably failed safety regulations back in 1982 that cost you 50p for which you get a shitty cup of tea and a pink wafer biscuit. I hate these groups with a passion.  They were my biggest source of “mummy guilt” with my first child and I’ve vowed not to put that kind of pressure on myself this time. I didn’t have any friends with children the same age and to be honest I’ve come to the realisation that I’m not your average mum. ByRead More →

Jesus wept people. St.George’s Cross is NOT racist.  I don’t think it is.  Why do you feel the need to share pictures on Facebook suggesting it is? The fact that you do suggests you think it is too. Although I have to admit when I see it I have a pang of “oh shit the EDL are on one again” St. George’s  Cross has been pinched by twatty right wing extremists and you are buying into their propaganda. Get a grip. It’s England’s flag.  Take it back from those wankers and make it something to be proud of.  Don’t go shouting “if you don’t likeRead More →

Erica’s blog. Stardate June 24th 2016.  See what I did there? So.  We voted Out. Fuck.  I wasn’t expecting that.  I thought it would be close but I never expected it to be that close.  I voted in. I felt we were stronger in the EU.  I owe the EU a lot, if it wasn’t for free movement I probably wouldn’t have met Vince (who’s French) and we wouldn’t have had our two beautiful children. How it will leave us as a family only time will tell. But.  The majority voted Out. We are a democracy and we must accept that.  I can only hopeRead More →

Those of you that read my first blog post will know that it was Big L’s 5th birthday party on Saturday.  If you haven’t read then it I urge you to. It’s hilarious. Honest guv. We (me and Other Mum) spent Friday getting most of the stuff ready for the party.  Sainsburys shopping for supplies. Preparing the food and party bags etc.  Well, I say we.  Other Mum ended up doing most of the work as Little L was having none of it.  I managed to wrap 30 sausage rolls in cling film.  I hate cling film.  It’s shit.  It sticks to everything but whatRead More →

One day Big L may read this (sooner rather than later at the rate he’s learning to read) and so, my Darling, I have to tell you that I love you very much but by heck you drive me fucking insane in the morning. Now I’m not a morning person. I find it difficult to get out of bed at the best of times.  Add to the mix making Daddy’s sandwiches (it’s cheese and ham daily but that’s all I can manage),  Big L’s breakfast and almost force feeding Big L said breakfast. “But,  Sweetheart. You asked for honey sandwiches” “I said honey. I meant Marmite”Read More →

So. Here it is. My first blog post. I’ve been umming and ahhing about writing a blog for a while. Despite appearances, I’m quite shy, but I also like to vent and I’m pretty opinionated – although I do value other people’s opinions and take them on board (at least I pretend to. I smile and nod and mutter “twat” quietly to myself). So. Let’s kick off with my first installment. Kids parties. So, it’s my first born’s 5th birthday soon and we are having a joint party for him with his friend. In a hall. With an entertainer. Fuck. My. Life. *sigh* This isRead More →