It’s been a while since I used a sunbed but my Bestie is getting married next weekend so I thought I’d treat myself to a course. I’ve left it a bit late but hey ho! Anyway, once you step in the shop it all comes flooding back. If you’ve never been before I’ve put together a little guide –
1) If you wear glasses you might not be able to see the START and STOP buttons. Locate these prior to taking off your glasses and entering the booth
2) If, like me, you’re a “sturdy girl” never, ever use the lie down beds. Your boobs and tummy will get all squished and likely burnt. You’ve seen kids with their faces pressed against a window…that’s your body.
3) For some reason (I’m sure it’s not for aesthetic purposes) the floor of stand up sunbeds is a mirror. Don’t, for the love of God, look down. I did. I’ve not had a wax for a while, I’ve also had one baby naturally (and an episiotomy). It’s a sight I’m not likely to forget for some time.
4) If you’ve got big boobs, or boobs that are pointing in a southerly direction spend at least half the time holding them up. Otherwise you’ll end up with a white upside-down McDonald’s M around your waist area (or in my case as low as your belly button).
5) Finally, unless you want a white arse crack BEND OVER!!
So, basically in order to get an even, all-over tan you need to be bending over while holding your boobs up, like this…
By the way, I’m not endorsing the use of sunbeds. Please be sensible and all that.
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